Recently I’ve had the privileged to post on Facebook about several recent experiences we’ve had with our eldest son. It was great to share how he gets to go to the state level for the Special Olympics, and he got to go to prom. While these are momentous occasions for any parent, as a parent of a special needs child, it was even more exciting in many ways for us.
Of course I thought back as well to how we like to post about the good things. It’s fun, and easy to celebrate. No one likes to talk on Facebook about the struggles, but just because we don’t talk about them, doesn’t mean they aren’t there.
I thought about that as I was driving home with my son tonight. For those who don’t know autistic people like routine, and tend to react negatively when things don’t go as planned. Every Tuesday night we go out to eat at a local restaurant. But due to reasons beyond our direct control, we had to leave without getting a chance to eat.
That led to what could be considered a “melt down”. I always thought of a melt down occurring for a small child. But when it happens with a 19 year old, it’s a whole different story. It was both embarrassing and nerve racking.
And as I thought, about how I could never share this experience on Facebook, a part of me thought maybe I should. Your see, parenting an autistic child, no matter the age, will always have its challenges.
So for the parents who are going through those tough times, I know what you are going through. It’s tough, and you may want to pull your hair out. (Don’t do it, it doesn’t help – trust the bald guy.)
But do know this. This phase will pass. Hang in there for your child, and your own sanity. There are good times coming. I know I never thought my child could handle prom, but he came back from the “best night ever” the other day hanging out and dancing with friends I never thought he’d be able to make.
That day will come for you and your child. Maybe in a a different way – but it’s version is coming, if you don’t give up.
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